VCBH: Stalker.

Okay, before we get into the nitty-gritty of this post, lemme tell a little story about real-life stalking.

I've often lamented the fact that my city isn't overly horse-friendly.  Not like my hometown (which, yeah, I get that I may sound overly homesick sometimes, but I moved for a reason and am sure as shit not moving back).  A sprinkling of barns on the outskirts and a Tractor Supply about an hour outside of town (at least, in rush hour traffic).

After Krav Maga last night, I decided that I absolutely had to make some lasagna.  D is doing a special diet as directed by a nutritionist for body-builders, so I've been graciously eating everything in the house that he can't.  Fending for myself here.

So I swing by the little grocery store in my neighborhood, derp on the aisle I'm supposed to be in, and encounter a woman in khaki ribbed breeches (looked more like Pikeur than my Tuffriders) and tall boots.  Being introverted doesn't mean I'm shy, so I had no problem immediately asking her where she rode.  This led to a ten minute conversation, an exchange of numbers, texts for hours and now I'm probably going to visit her super-fancy barn tonight.

The moral of this story:  wear your riding clothes everywhere.

On to internet stalking!

L asks:  what equestrian blogger out there do you really want to meet?

Answering this and reading the answers makes me feel really clique.  So, sincere apologies to those outside my immediate circle of stalkerdom, but these are the women I know best.

  • L, because she should have been my real-life bestie by now.  I had all sorts of plans for making her teach me how to ride.  For drinking.  For binge sugar eating.  But, for what it's worth, I talk to her more than I talk to people who live in my city and I think that counts for something.  Also, who's to say that Savannah and SCAD would be as fulfilling as the program that has eaten all of her time now?
  • Hillary, because she's one classy lady and we have ponies and puppies in common.  Also, she's super easy to talk to.  I want to go visit her!  See the place my pony was born, drink mint juleps, touch expensive leather, and try to pick up on some of her amazing fashion sense.  Can "classy" rub off?

  • Carly, because no one else I know swears like a fucking sailor quite like me, except that fabulous bitch.  Totally admit that I had a woman-crush on her because of her strong personality and ability to ride Bobert in whatever discipline struck her fancy.  

  • The Endurance Trifecta:  Saiph, Liz and Dom.  Congrats, you're all one person now.  I love reading their shenanigans (catch that? I'm even stalking your inside jokes) and can't think of much better than riding a pony for hours and hours and then having a couple of beers with these ladies.  Except, you know, riding Archie for hours and hours and then having a couple of beers with all these ladies.

  • "Solo's Mom".  She's super duper busy having a job and building her own farm, but I really think that if I could spend a day following her around (with the horses, not so much the fish), I'd glean more than I have in the last year.  She oozes knowledge.
(le sigh.  I couldn't steal her header.)

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  1. Nah I don't think its cliqueish. I want to meet pretty much everyone I read but I limited myself down to 5, and I did it in order of priority of really WHO SHOULD I have meet by now. Some internet personalities I've been friends with going on 8 years now and I STILL haven't met them and that makes me sad.

  2. I need to sit down to do this blog hop. You are on my list of 5 too. If you are back in the area one day, we should try to make this meet-up happen. Liz is 4 hours in one direction from me, Dom is 4 hours in the other direction. Riding for hours and hours and beers after? Sounds like a totally doable plan! Especially since the THREE of us have multiple horses! ;) have totally named our team if we ever get to ride together in the same distance division! "Endurance Trifecta"..I fucking LOVE it!

  3. Endurance Trifecta!! I love it. This made my day. Also, we drink 'shine, not beer ;) Seconding what Saiph said about our endurance team name. ONE HUNDRED MILES!!!

    1. If y'all get shirts made, can I have an honorary one?

      And moonshine sits me on my ass, but I'll still contribute some Georgia applejack. :)

    2. Of course you can have an honorary shirt! :D Yay moonshine, applejack and beer! And horses! And more horses!


    3. I love this! Definitely our team name and you can definitely have a shirt, Beka! And then sit around and be drunk and raucous with us post-ride. Please and thank you. can vacation to WV for August 2 and see us all and drink heavily (on shine) and eat well (on a slow-cooked whole hog).

      ....ONE HUNDRED MILES? I'm still worried about this even though I DO want to do it lol.

  4. Wow, I applaud you on your ability to approach strangers in grocery stores. Whenever I chance upon a fellow equestrian, I always just give them a creepy smile like, "I see you in your tight pants, and I like them." But I'm sure that translates into something else when I don't say anything to explain the creepy creeper smile.


      I just envisioned you winking and leering, wearing your helmet in a grocery store. Helmet, always.

      I think I have two personalities, really. The fun, loud, approach-strangers me and the OMFG-GTFO, super bitchy me. It's like a coin toss!

  5. Woohoo for new riding buddies! :)

    And thanks for the awesome little blurb. I want to stalk you too ;) also you're classy too so quit that blabbering! :)

    1. Ps I'm sad I didn't think to steal ppls banners!

    2. Dude, "classy" hasn't ever been used to describe me. I am who I am, but one day.. I hope to be a little more of a lady. Maybe. A lady who swears a lot. And talks about sex. And makes awkward conversation even more uncomfortable.

      The banner thing was my second-option.. first option was going to be photoshopping faces together. Who's got the time?!

  6. Awwww, that is so sweet!! Someone thinks I know something, hahahahha -- yes, my evil plan is working. Oh, um, wait, did I type that out loud??

    I love reading TEH OWLZ! I am only sad that I rarely have time to comment on everyone's blogs anymore. If my dumb horse would stop stressing me out...I mean, er, being awesome, that would help!

    I always want to do the blog hops (and am still sitting on my great idea for one, but it appears to be my ass), but damned if my brain is ever awake and cooperative when I want it to be! Although I have now learned that my no-stealing pics thingy works, which is kinda funny, b/c I put it on there so long ago and yet I seriously doubt anyone has their eye on pictures of my horse's self-resected foot. Or so they...

    Oh and here: (shhh, don't tell...she says on the interwebz)

    1. And derp, I just realized that doesn't have the blog name on it. Here, have my email sig, hahahhaha!