28 Days Later

Like a zombie, I rise.

I can tell you that this whole experience has been hard.  The overall taste in my mouth isn't just that my husband separated from me, but that he decimated me.  This was no graceful goodbye.

It's been important during this process to take care of myself so I can better take care of my daughter.  I've had to be quick on my feet and adjustable as well as ..just.. durable.  I'm still human and I'm still hurt, and, oh hey, still super pregnant.  So there are moments where I find myself screaming, crying, and trying so desperately hard not to text him again.  For the record, he hasn't answered in weeks.

I've learned a lot about myself, my husband and my marriage over the past four weeks.  I'm defeated by some of it and disgusted by other parts.  I'm impressed with how fucking well I've kept my shit together.

Again, I appreciate everyone who's reached out, offered an ear, a word, baby clothes, or food.  My shit would have crumbled without y'all.

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11 comments

  1. Thinking of you and wishing I were closer to offer more tangible assistance ❤️

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  2. Been thinking about you lots and sending you all the love and positive vibes I can! <3

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  3. I’m so sorry, unreal...but joy is coming soon, an indescribable, honest and wholly reciprocated love from your sweet baby girl. Big hugs.

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  4. You are such a strong, courageous woman! Sending good vies to you and your beautiful girl coming soon!

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  5. Sometimes, or for me it was most times - it's just making it from one minute (or second) to the next. You are rising and you will continue to do so.

    In the meantime, can I slash his tires? Maybe lace his food with some norovirus? Set free some bedbugs and fire ants into wherever he's living?

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  6. :(
    I am so sorry. Just know you are constantly in my thoughts and I know that you have a very large and supportive group that cares about you immensely. You are such a strong and brave person <3 Never forget that you are fierce and beautiful!

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  7. I don't often comment, but I've read and enjoyed your blog for years, mostly because you're a lot of things I'd like to be: strong, funny, and just super cool. You've totally got this, and you deserve all the good things in life.

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  8. Take care of yourself. Thinking about you daily and praying for strength.

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  9. Hope you're taking the time to take care of yourself too. Soon you're going to meet that amazing little girl, and it will all be worth it. Until then, cut yourself some slack. You're doing amazing, and you deserve all the happiness that will come your way. (and he deserves all the heartache and guilt)

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  10. I've been thinking of you! Hang in there.

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Thanks!